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Reviewing every Mario Kart Wii tracks and ranking them afterwards

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Messages 1034 - Golden Mario Golden Mario
vs29534 pts ★ Legend
battle6835 pts ★ Racer
Australia
Another hot take with GBA BC3 lol.

Your points are valid, but it's definitely not forgettable. It's actually one of my favourite tracks in MKWii.

I can't really pinpoint what it is about the track, maybe it's the intensity of the music paired with the the harsh turns and thwomps, but this track is really fun. I guess it's just one of those things you can't really explain.
mario_shrug1
Messages 1226 - Golden Mario Golden Mario
vs17573 pts ★ Master
battle5983 pts ★ Novice
Philippines
Invu wrote:
The main road is more slippery than my mental state.

And I thought I was the only one with a bad mental state
xd2
Messages 10852 - King Mario King Mario
vs35265 pts ★ Legend
battle6102 pts ★ Racer
France
BowserJr03 wrote:
Another hot take with GBA BC3 lol.

Your points are valid, but it's definitely not forgettable. It's actually one of my favourite tracks in MKWii.

I can't really pinpoint what it is about the track, maybe it's the intensity of the music paired with the the harsh turns and thwomps, but this track is really fun. I guess it's just one of those things you can't really explain.

I don't know, when I'm saying I forget about it, it's a similar case to Grumble Volcano, I forget it appears in Wii since I probably played the MKPC version more 💀
Messages 3454 - King Mario King Mario
vs13543 pts ★ Champion
battle5368 pts ★ Novice
United Kingdom
ItzD4rk wrote:
Invu wrote:
The main road is more slippery than my mental state.

And I thought I was the only one with a bad mental state

That’s where you’re wrong bud
Messages 10852 - King Mario King Mario
vs35265 pts ★ Legend
battle6102 pts ★ Racer
France
SNES Mario Circuit 3
Pretty sure I'm gonna get bashed for this, MC3 isn't very fun. It's a bunch of sharp and tight turns that are hard to negotiate. Sure, it's fun for TT, but I don't really like it aside from that. As much as I despise this music and this background, I have to admit this isn't a very important point. Tbh, this circuit is very boring, they could have chose a better track tbh. It is fun to get a Mario Circuit in one of the hardest cups, that's a concept I really want to try for QM (and I already did with Oilpipe Outpost lol) So this track could have been better, but it also suffers from the fact that there is a lot of Mario Circuit tracks in this game already. Sure, it's very different with a way more challenging take, but it's still kind of annoying if you get my point. There is Mario Circuit, Mario Circuit, Mario Raceway and Mario Circuit 3. Kinda boring after a time, since they aren't the most interesting tracks. It would be a 2/5 for me, sorry to any pro wandering by there. 😭
DS Peach Gardens
The hedges always made me suffer. I liked how MK8DX reduced their height; it made the whole section more enjoyable and less cramped. Aside from that, the track is fun. It's pretty hard but it's a good challenge nonetheless. This track has a really good themkng, nice visuals, I just hate the hedge section, even if it's challenging and even if I'm never bumping in one. I'll make this track a 4/5, it doesn't really deserve less,
but it cannot be rated higher in my opinion.
GCN DK Mountain
This track is so good. In this game, most of the challenging tracks are... truly challenging, and some of them can turn out frustrating. However, DK Mountain is a rare exception when the provided challenge is just a ton of fun. The track resembles DK Summit but in a more exotic and more challenging form. Getting launched to a frowning volcano. Then you'll have to get down the mountain, with the bumps everywhere, some trick ramps, some half-pipes. There is some tight turns with the good idea of making the grass not off-road (yeah, the road being wide is making me accept U turns which I always hated). The boulders are super fun, they provide another challenge without being that hard. The gap jump is fun. And let's not forget the bridge at the end, which can be really annoying, but which is still kinda fun nonetheless. The visuals are gorgeous, the theming is interesting and exotic, it plays good, provides a challenge without being frustrating. 5/5
N64 Bowser's Castle
It's a fun track, I like how many rooms it include. The garden where there is a Bowser statue. The first room with Marty, an hallway, the second room with Thwomps that quickly wander from one point to another, the thin hallway after that, the third room with side Thwomps, the lava room with bridge, the stairs, the small courtyard, and the exterior road with a lot of jump and some mysterious houses. The track looks good, provides a good challenge and a long ride. I feel like it doesn't look as good as the Wii version though, but it is also darker and less rhythmic, situated in the middle of a lava sea at nighttime. This track deserves an easy 4,5/5.

I DID IT ! I RATED ALL THE TRACKS.
party3
Messages 48 - Koopa Koopa
vs10069 pts ★ Champion
battle5000 pts ★ Novice
United States
Invu wrote:
N64 Sherbet Land
I didn't hate on many tracks since we've started this list, but I guess it's finally time. This track is bad. It's boring. It's slippery. Nothing to like here. The road is way too wide so the track feels empty. The only distraction are some little penguins here and there and a big penguin who got himself stuck on an island somehow. The music is really good, sure. But aisde from that it's really meh. It's just an icy sea, with some ice to form a racetrack over it. There's barely anything to keep that part (and oh my god that part is SOOOOOO long) interesting, there's just one rock at some point and a ramp. Thank god I would have fell asleep without that. The cave is a better section than the ice pack by miles. No slippery physics. Some actual challenge. Beautiful textures. Pillars and penguins to dodge. DIfferent strategies to choose. But yet again, it can barely save Sherbet Land. I'm sorry, but this can't be rated any higher than 1,5/5.

GBA Shy Guy Beach
Holy Wargod the first half of the Banana Cup is terrible. Two boring tracks in a row. Anyways, this track is still a bit better though. Some bombs are falling from the backgroun and it's honestly good they actually make a risk instead of the GBA version where they did NOTHING. The graphics and the music aren't that good ; the gameplay is still a bit boring despite some offroad and some jumps placed on the track. This is a 2/5.

DS Delfino Square
It really came at the right time to save us from this abysmal cup. This track is absolutely stunning. EVerything about it is AMAZING. It's quaint, it has some challenge, tons of shortcuts, a good music, incredible visuals, fairly good gameplay etc. It's really a track I'm looking forward to when I'm stucked on Sherbet Land trying to tell myself that the track is done soon and that I'm gonna play Delfino Square later. There's so many detail. SO MANY DETAILS. There's some clothes tied up on a rope over the streets. There's an alternate path where you kinda choose where to go. There's a ramp that allows you to jump over a lake and skip a big part of the track if you're good enough. There's a little muddy street that can be very useful if you have a mushroom, there's even a bridge with boosts at the end. This is easily a 5/5, a breathtaking and varied track with so many details to see.

GCN Waluigi Stadium
It looks like the Banana Cup is split into two parts : boring and amazing. This track is part of the amazing half. It's got lot to please. Some shortcuts to go through the mud here and there, lots of ramps... The track keeps you excited to the every last second. I hated this track before since as a kid I got shocked over the void after the big jump on L3 and I would lost 7 ranks for that + the gold banana cup. I was disgusted lol. But aside from that it's a really good track, that used the halfpipes at their full potential. Antoehr 5/5.

ds delfino square is the best mkwii track. nobody can disagree with me otherwise.
down3
up1
Messages 1563 - Golden Mario Golden Mario
vs9565 pts ★ Expert
battle5000 pts ★ Novice
United States
Invu wrote:
SNES Mario Circuit 3
Pretty sure I'm gonna get bashed for this, MC3 isn't very fun. It's a bunch of sharp and tight turns that are hard to negotiate. Sure, it's fun for TT, but I don't really like it aside from that. As much as I despise this music and this background, I have to admit this isn't a very important point. Tbh, this circuit is very boring, they could have chose a better track tbh. It is fun to get a Mario Circuit in one of the hardest cups, that's a concept I really want to try for QM (and I already did with Oilpipe Outpost lol) So this track could have been better, but it also suffers from the fact that there is a lot of Mario Circuit tracks in this game already. Sure, it's very different with a way more challenging take, but it's still kind of annoying if you get my point. There is Mario Circuit, Mario Circuit, Mario Raceway and Mario Circuit 3. Kinda boring after a time, since they aren't the most interesting tracks. It would be a 2/5 for me, sorry to any pro wandering by there. 😭
DS Peach Gardens
The hedges always made me suffer. I liked how MK8DX reduced their height; it made the whole section more enjoyable and less cramped. Aside from that, the track is fun. It's pretty hard but it's a good challenge nonetheless. This track has a really good themkng, nice visuals, I just hate the hedge section, even if it's challenging and even if I'm never bumping in one. I'll make this track a 4/5, it doesn't really deserve less,
but it cannot be rated higher in my opinion.
GCN DK Mountain
This track is so good. In this game, most of the challenging tracks are... truly challenging, and some of them can turn out frustrating. However, DK Mountain is a rare exception when the provided challenge is just a ton of fun. The track resembles DK Summit but in a more exotic and more challenging form. Getting launched to a frowning volcano. Then you'll have to get down the mountain, with the bumps everywhere, some trick ramps, some half-pipes. There is some tight turns with the good idea of making the grass not off-road (yeah, the road being wide is making me accept U turns which I always hated). The boulders are super fun, they provide another challenge without being that hard. The gap jump is fun. And let's not forget the bridge at the end, which can be really annoying, but which is still kinda fun nonetheless. The visuals are gorgeous, the theming is interesting and exotic, it plays good, provides a challenge without being frustrating. 5/5
N64 Bowser's Castle
It's a fun track, I like how many rooms it include. The garden where there is a Bowser statue. The first room with Marty, an hallway, the second room with Thwomps that quickly wander from one point to another, the thin hallway after that, the third room with side Thwomps, the lava room with bridge, the stairs, the small courtyard, and the exterior road with a lot of jump and some mysterious houses. The track looks good, provides a good challenge and a long ride. I feel like it doesn't look as good as the Wii version though, but it is also darker and less rhythmic, situated in the middle of a lava sea at nighttime. This track deserves an easy 4,5/5.

I DID IT ! I RATED ALL THE TRACKS.

Now To Do CTGP  lol
xd4
Messages 10852 - King Mario King Mario
vs35265 pts ★ Legend
battle6102 pts ★ Racer
France
Now I need to separate the tracks into tiers regarding the rating they got. Here it is!

1-1,5/5 : 1 track
- N64 Sherbet Land

2-2,5/5 : 7 tracks
- Luigi Circuit
- DS Yoshi Falls
- SNES Ghost Valley 2
- GBA Shy Guy Beach
- Moonview Highway if I'm annoyed
- N64 DK's Jungle Parkway
- SNES Mario Circuit 3

3-3,5/5 6 tracks
- Moo Moo Meadows
- GCN Peach Beach
- Mario Circuit
- DS Desert Hills
- GBA Bowser Castle 3
- GCN Mario Circuit

4-4,5/5 9 tracks
- N64 Mario Raceway
- Wario's Gold Mine
- Daisy Circuit
- Grumble Volcano
- Dry Dry Ruins
- Moonview Highway if I feel good
- Bowser Castle
- DS Peach Gardens
- N64 Bowser's Castle

5/5 : 10 tracks
- Mushroom Gorge
- Toad's Factory
- Coconut Mall
- DK Summit
- Koopa Cape
- Maple Treeway
- Rainbow Road
- DS Delfino Square
- GCN Waluigi Stadium
- GCN DK Mountain

Mushroom Cup (3,75)
2/5
3/5
5/5
5/5
Shell Cup (2,75)
3/5
2/5
2/5
4/5
Flower Cup (4,37)
3,5/5
5/5
5/5
4/5
Banana Cup (3,37)
1,5/5
2/5
5/5
5/5
Star Cup (4,75)
4,5/5
5/5
5/5
4,5/5
Leaf Cup (3,00)
3/5
3/5
2/5
3,5/5
Special Cup (4,19)
4,5/5
3,25/5 (2,5/5 or 4/5)
4/5
5/5
Lightning Cup (3,87)
2/5
4/5
5/5
4,5/5

Mischievous facts :
- The only track in the whole game being rated under 2 is N64 Sherbet Land.
- The Star Cup hasn't any track rated under 4,5/5, and is the best cup of the game according to scores.
- The Leaf Cup hasn't any track rated above 3,5/5, yet isn't the worst cup of the game despite not shining with any track. The worst cup is the Shell Cup with 2,75 of average score compared to Leaf Cup's 3/5 average score.
- The biggest amount of tracks in a category is ten, being in the 5/5 category, which shows the tracks are pretty solid in my opinion.
- The smallest amount of tracks in a category is one, being in the 1/5 category, which shows the tracks aren't that bad in my opinion.
- If you calculate Special Cup with the two ratings of Moonview Highway, it gives out a 4/5 rating, showing that calculating the Special Cup average with the average score of both Moonview Highway's scores gives out a better score since the downgrade that the average of the cup will take will be lower.
- Moonview Highway is the only track to have two ratings.  
- Nobody asked for this long message.
Messages 10852 - King Mario King Mario
vs35265 pts ★ Legend
battle6102 pts ★ Racer
France
Now that we've gone through reviewing, we'll go through the funnier part: ranking ! I'll be ranking them from worst to best.
Let's get started with tracks that I truly dislike...

32 - N64 Sherbet Land
This is a very boring track, basically having a stroll on enormous icebergs and with some penguins here and there. The slippery physics of this track can get very annoying, however it's possible to cut small corners so that makes up for it I guess. The problem of this track is that everything going for it is basically... a ramp and a cave. The cave part is pretty good, but can be hard to navigate. Special mention to the penguin who somehow went onto that ice island to never escape again. It's overall boring and annoying to play on.

31 - SNES Mario Circuit 3
This track is actually forgettable as hell, it's basically a SNES Mario Circuit, nothing to get excited about... it also has alot of sharp turns that I'm not really a fan of. The shortcuts, the puddles and the boosts are kinda great but this track is kinda annoying in my opinion.

30 - N64 DK's Jungle Parkway
If it didn't had these janky slopes for no absolute reason I'd appreciate the theming and the visuals enough. However, this track is also very boring, except for the jump which is kinda great and the cave section which is pretty good as well. That's why it's ranked this low. Yep. A janky gimmick can ruin a track.

Alright that's everything I'll be covering today.
Messages 1024 - Golden Mario Golden Mario
vs11662 pts ★ Champion
battle5563 pts ★ Novice
United Kingdom
I feel like the only person who likes N64 Sherbet Land
thumbsup1
Messages 1563 - Golden Mario Golden Mario
vs9565 pts ★ Expert
battle5000 pts ★ Novice
United States
Teon5072 wrote:
I feel like the only person who likes N64 Sherbet Land

Me Too. It Is Actually A Good Track But People Are Like "ItS JuSt VaNiLa LaKe 2". Also HOW IS SNES MARIO CIRCUIT 3 FORGETTABLE!?!??! The Only Actually Forgettable Mario Circuit  Is SNES Mario Circuit 4!
Messages 10852 - King Mario King Mario
vs35265 pts ★ Legend
battle6102 pts ★ Racer
France
Coopa2-64 wrote:
Teon5072 wrote:
I feel like the only person who likes N64 Sherbet Land

Me Too. It Is Actually A Good Track But People Are Like "ItS JuSt VaNiLa LaKe 2". Also HOW IS SNES MARIO CIRCUIT 3 FORGETTABLE!?!??! The Only Actually Forgettable Mario Circuit  Is SNES Mario Circuit 4!

No MC4 is way lelss forgettable than MC3. Also you're gonna calm down asap, I have the right to have opinions and you have to chill. Tssk.
thumbsup1
Messages 3454 - King Mario King Mario
vs13543 pts ★ Champion
battle5368 pts ★ Novice
United Kingdom
Coopa2-64 wrote:
Teon5072 wrote:
I feel like the only person who likes N64 Sherbet Land

Me Too. It Is Actually A Good Track But People Are Like "ItS JuSt VaNiLa LaKe 2". Also HOW IS SNES MARIO CIRCUIT 3 FORGETTABLE!?!??! The Only Actually Forgettable Mario Circuit  Is SNES Mario Circuit 4!

Mario Circuit 4 is forgettable? I wanted that more than MC3 in the BCP. I hate the current overuse of the previously mentioned Mario Circuit 3 and Rainbow Road, not so much the track itself but just that there's other options.
thumbsup2
Messages 1563 - Golden Mario Golden Mario
vs9565 pts ★ Expert
battle5000 pts ★ Novice
United States
Fiery wrote:
Coopa2-64 wrote:
Teon5072 wrote:
I feel like the only person who likes N64 Sherbet Land

Me Too. It Is Actually A Good Track But People Are Like "ItS JuSt VaNiLa LaKe 2". Also HOW IS SNES MARIO CIRCUIT 3 FORGETTABLE!?!??! The Only Actually Forgettable Mario Circuit  Is SNES Mario Circuit 4!

Mario Circuit 4 is forgettable? I wanted that more than MC3 in the BCP. I hate the current overuse of the previously mentioned Mario Circuit 3 and Rainbow Road, not so much the track itself but just that there's other options.

Like SNES Mario Circuit 2
Messages 10852 - King Mario King Mario
vs35265 pts ★ Legend
battle6102 pts ★ Racer
France
Coopa2-64 wrote:
Fiery wrote:
Coopa2-64 wrote:
Teon5072 wrote:
I feel like the only person who likes N64 Sherbet Land

Me Too. It Is Actually A Good Track But People Are Like "ItS JuSt VaNiLa LaKe 2". Also HOW IS SNES MARIO CIRCUIT 3 FORGETTABLE!?!??! The Only Actually Forgettable Mario Circuit  Is SNES Mario Circuit 4!

Mario Circuit 4 is forgettable? I wanted that more than MC3 in the BCP. I hate the current overuse of the previously mentioned Mario Circuit 3 and Rainbow Road, not so much the track itself but just that there's other options.

Like SNES Mario Circuit 2

Yet this one is actually good
Messages 3454 - King Mario King Mario
vs13543 pts ★ Champion
battle5368 pts ★ Novice
United Kingdom
FR_Lely wrote:
Coopa2-64 wrote:
Fiery wrote:
Coopa2-64 wrote:
Teon5072 wrote:
I feel like the only person who likes N64 Sherbet Land

Me Too. It Is Actually A Good Track But People Are Like "ItS JuSt VaNiLa LaKe 2". Also HOW IS SNES MARIO CIRCUIT 3 FORGETTABLE!?!??! The Only Actually Forgettable Mario Circuit  Is SNES Mario Circuit 4!

Mario Circuit 4 is forgettable? I wanted that more than MC3 in the BCP. I hate the current overuse of the previously mentioned Mario Circuit 3 and Rainbow Road, not so much the track itself but just that there's other options.

Like SNES Mario Circuit 2

Yet this one is actually good

MC2 > every SNES MC
thumbsup3
Messages 1563 - Golden Mario Golden Mario
vs9565 pts ★ Expert
battle5000 pts ★ Novice
United States
Fiery wrote:
FR_Lely wrote:
Coopa2-64 wrote:
Fiery wrote:
Coopa2-64 wrote:
Teon5072 wrote:
I feel like the only person who likes N64 Sherbet Land

Me Too. It Is Actually A Good Track But People Are Like "ItS JuSt VaNiLa LaKe 2". Also HOW IS SNES MARIO CIRCUIT 3 FORGETTABLE!?!??! The Only Actually Forgettable Mario Circuit  Is SNES Mario Circuit 4!

Mario Circuit 4 is forgettable? I wanted that more than MC3 in the BCP. I hate the current overuse of the previously mentioned Mario Circuit 3 and Rainbow Road, not so much the track itself but just that there's other options.

Like SNES Mario Circuit 2

Yet this one is actually good

MC2 > every SNES MC

It Has a Big Jump Unlike Every Other SNES Course
Messages 1034 - Golden Mario Golden Mario
vs29534 pts ★ Legend
battle6835 pts ★ Racer
Australia
SNES MC 3 is fine, it's one of the better SNES tracks. It was a good thing it was in the BCP, meaning we didn't get another worse track (MC2 probably wouldn't have been there bc a lot of the courses were already in mk7).

MC4 is pretty much MC3 but mirrored and with a few width changes in a nutshell. If one is forgettable then the other one should be too.

N64 Sherbet Land is among the worst tracks in mkwii but it doesn't mean it's necessarily bad. It's just a bit too long. I've also never heard anyone call it a Vanilla Lake.
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