Horribly translated crap
1556 - 
35029 pts ★ Legend
13857 pts ★ ChampionOn 2023-10-19 at 21:40:48
Switched to high-fire firing from the BLU Pyro's launcher. He points his gun into the air and smiles triumphantly as a missile flies across the screen towards him.]
Pyro: [A missile hits the unconscious Pyro.] "Ah!"
[To the BLU Demoman drinking while being blasted off-screen by a Crit missile.]
[To BLU Heavy, who staged a mock confrontation.]
Heavy: "Captive!" [Explosion, most likely accompanied by a third Crit missile]
[The text "Soldier's Meeting" appears.]
[Turns to the soldier, looks at what looks like a row of soldiers.]
Soldier: "If the war must be won, you must fight!" Sun Tzu said so, and I'd say he knows a little more about war than you, my friend, because he invented it. This he did, and then he perfected it until no man could ever "surpass a living man in the ring of honour."
[Martial Arts Games]
[Speech of the soldier holding his ship and shouting.]
[The soldier then shoots the final capture point in the Granary with his rifle, killing the Demoman, who shoots him but misses. It transforms into a rocket launcher and a BLU doctor appears behind it, firing syringes.]
Red Demoman: "Left!"
Soldier: "Maggots!"
[The soldier turns left and fires a missile at the doctor, trapping him.]
Red Sniper: "Get up! Get up!"
Red Heavy: "Go, go, go!"
[Soldiers, Sniper and Heavy enter battle as explosions occur around them.]
[End to troop training. The music stops.]
Soldier: "Then he used the war money...
[The soldier unholsters two hand grenades from his belt.]
Soldier: ... take one from every animal in the world, then take them to the boat...
[Soldier demonstrates how to use grenades and detonates them by making a walking motion.]
Soldier: ...and then hit each one individually.
[The soldier throws two grenades at each other several times.]
[Let's go back to the battlefield. The music starts again.]
Red Scout: (behind cover) "The guard is there!"
[The soldier runs towards the guard's gun and fires a rocket into the pipe, knocking the guard out and killing the engineer in the process.]
[BLU Heavy and Pyro capture the final capture point. He smiles happily. The soldier jumps down and fires a critical missile, landing on the ground before impact. It kills both Heavy and Pyro in the explosion. The spy takes off his shirt and tries to stab the soldier in the back, but the soldier takes off his tent and quickly throws the spy out.]
[Freeze Frame]
[Military training started]
Soldier: (laughing to himself) "And from that day on, whenever a group of animals gathers in one place, they call it 'zozen'!"
[Screams are heard as the "Soldiers" are revealed to be standing in the portal with the Gibbed heads of Team BLU members, and they are all wearing BLU Soldier helmets. The doctor's head falls out of the portal.]
[Team Fortress 2 ends with great music.]
Soldier: (To the Chief Doctor) "Until there is no agriculture left!"
Pyro: [A missile hits the unconscious Pyro.] "Ah!"
[To the BLU Demoman drinking while being blasted off-screen by a Crit missile.]
[To BLU Heavy, who staged a mock confrontation.]
Heavy: "Captive!" [Explosion, most likely accompanied by a third Crit missile]
[The text "Soldier's Meeting" appears.]
[Turns to the soldier, looks at what looks like a row of soldiers.]
Soldier: "If the war must be won, you must fight!" Sun Tzu said so, and I'd say he knows a little more about war than you, my friend, because he invented it. This he did, and then he perfected it until no man could ever "surpass a living man in the ring of honour."
[Martial Arts Games]
[Speech of the soldier holding his ship and shouting.]
[The soldier then shoots the final capture point in the Granary with his rifle, killing the Demoman, who shoots him but misses. It transforms into a rocket launcher and a BLU doctor appears behind it, firing syringes.]
Red Demoman: "Left!"
Soldier: "Maggots!"
[The soldier turns left and fires a missile at the doctor, trapping him.]
Red Sniper: "Get up! Get up!"
Red Heavy: "Go, go, go!"
[Soldiers, Sniper and Heavy enter battle as explosions occur around them.]
[End to troop training. The music stops.]
Soldier: "Then he used the war money...
[The soldier unholsters two hand grenades from his belt.]
Soldier: ... take one from every animal in the world, then take them to the boat...
[Soldier demonstrates how to use grenades and detonates them by making a walking motion.]
Soldier: ...and then hit each one individually.
[The soldier throws two grenades at each other several times.]
[Let's go back to the battlefield. The music starts again.]
Red Scout: (behind cover) "The guard is there!"
[The soldier runs towards the guard's gun and fires a rocket into the pipe, knocking the guard out and killing the engineer in the process.]
[BLU Heavy and Pyro capture the final capture point. He smiles happily. The soldier jumps down and fires a critical missile, landing on the ground before impact. It kills both Heavy and Pyro in the explosion. The spy takes off his shirt and tries to stab the soldier in the back, but the soldier takes off his tent and quickly throws the spy out.]
[Freeze Frame]
[Military training started]
Soldier: (laughing to himself) "And from that day on, whenever a group of animals gathers in one place, they call it 'zozen'!"
[Screams are heard as the "Soldiers" are revealed to be standing in the portal with the Gibbed heads of Team BLU members, and they are all wearing BLU Soldier helmets. The doctor's head falls out of the portal.]
[Team Fortress 2 ends with great music.]
Soldier: (To the Chief Doctor) "Until there is no agriculture left!"