Ranking every Mario Kart by balancing
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8053 pts ★ Expert
5052 pts ★ NoviceOn 2023-09-24 at 23:26:28
Yep, I am ranking again. I am ranking the Mario karts based on how balanced they are, like if we get OP items to counter OP CPUs or if 1st place 4 times is a challenging task to accomplish on 150cc.
I will rate them on how hard is it to beat the game. However, both too easy and too hard are bad. Just saying.
9. Super Mario Kart
Of course they had to put stupidly OP AI with special items, invincibility to red shells, and rubber banding. What do they give us? The rare lap skipping feather that practically occurs once in a blue moon. Trust me, getting the alcohol drink is a nightmare. However I have massive respect for those who beat the entire game without raging.
8. Mario Kart Super Circuit
The AIs are a piece of cake unlike Super Mario Kart, issue is the game won't give you triple stars if you are too good of a player, it's so goofy that even using a red shell will give you negative points.
7. Mario Kart 8
At this rate, I will bring up meta combo, so now we have to worry about vehicle balancing. Speed is the way to go, and fire hopping is too good. Also, there are no double item boxes, so you get infinite coins and you get red shelled a million times due to that.
6. Mario Kart 8 Deluxe
It suffers more from the meta combo, as we went from badass characters on baby toys to now somewhat baby characters on baby toys. Now we have to worry about two red shells instead of 1. Thank God we don't get 2 coins.
5. Mario Kart Wii
The vehicles are too unbalanced and there's way too much goofy glitches. Also the CPUs are really weak so they can't do much.
4. Mario Kart Double Dash
Only issue is some items are better than others, and King Boo and Petey are too good(they should have brung the boo back for them ngl but then there is no point of getting them). However, there is snaking for us in case the enemy uses their OP special item.
3. Mario Kart 64
Hot take: Mario Kart 64 rubber banding isn't a nightmare. You get golden shrooms and stars in second place to balance it out. The glitches can be goofy, but you need mushrooms for them to work most of the time. However if you're too far ahead, the AI uses a bullet bill then gets close to you.
2. Mario Kart DS
Only issue is snaking. However, you can avoid snaking entirely and still win. There's also side spinning red shells, but if you are a snake a holic, you would survive with banana defense.
1. Mario Kart 7
I dunno why Bandy complains about bad item balancing, he says a million blue shells hit per race, but if you front run the game, it's ok. The CPUs aren't even that good tbh.
I will rate them on how hard is it to beat the game. However, both too easy and too hard are bad. Just saying.
9. Super Mario Kart
Of course they had to put stupidly OP AI with special items, invincibility to red shells, and rubber banding. What do they give us? The rare lap skipping feather that practically occurs once in a blue moon. Trust me, getting the alcohol drink is a nightmare. However I have massive respect for those who beat the entire game without raging.
8. Mario Kart Super Circuit
The AIs are a piece of cake unlike Super Mario Kart, issue is the game won't give you triple stars if you are too good of a player, it's so goofy that even using a red shell will give you negative points.
7. Mario Kart 8
At this rate, I will bring up meta combo, so now we have to worry about vehicle balancing. Speed is the way to go, and fire hopping is too good. Also, there are no double item boxes, so you get infinite coins and you get red shelled a million times due to that.
6. Mario Kart 8 Deluxe
It suffers more from the meta combo, as we went from badass characters on baby toys to now somewhat baby characters on baby toys. Now we have to worry about two red shells instead of 1. Thank God we don't get 2 coins.
5. Mario Kart Wii
The vehicles are too unbalanced and there's way too much goofy glitches. Also the CPUs are really weak so they can't do much.
4. Mario Kart Double Dash
Only issue is some items are better than others, and King Boo and Petey are too good(they should have brung the boo back for them ngl but then there is no point of getting them). However, there is snaking for us in case the enemy uses their OP special item.
3. Mario Kart 64
Hot take: Mario Kart 64 rubber banding isn't a nightmare. You get golden shrooms and stars in second place to balance it out. The glitches can be goofy, but you need mushrooms for them to work most of the time. However if you're too far ahead, the AI uses a bullet bill then gets close to you.
2. Mario Kart DS
Only issue is snaking. However, you can avoid snaking entirely and still win. There's also side spinning red shells, but if you are a snake a holic, you would survive with banana defense.
1. Mario Kart 7
I dunno why Bandy complains about bad item balancing, he says a million blue shells hit per race, but if you front run the game, it's ok. The CPUs aren't even that good tbh.
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